Acceptance towards ourselves and our children

This year's school talk at my son's school was slightly different. Instead of just going through the scores, we focused more on his emotional state.

I was displeased that the school did not reach out to me earlier than my taking the initiative to get help from a children's psychologist. As from there, I had a questionnaire given to the school teachers to fill in.

The response from the teachers was their not knowing how to bring it out to me without worrying me. I honestly think it is a poor excuse, but I do understand that there are parents who have difficulties in accepting their children having difficulties or issues. Many would go into a denial stage.

 

 

Without accepting our children having difficulties, we cannot be there for them to get the right help they need. As an adult, we also learn to accept ourselves for whom we are, and realizing that we are not perfect. So for our children, we must do the same.

 

Sure enough, it is music to our ears if we hear only compliments on how well behaving our children are. At the same time, I am glad I have less difficulties than others accepting criticisms over my son. As his mother, often I know what the issues are, and how he behaves in general.

 

My job as his mother is to tell him what is acceptable and what is not, but to still let him know I am here for him, and that I will keep loving him not matter what. Each day I will forgive and forget what he has done wrong, move on, and this is what as parents should do. As parents, you will never give up.

 

There are plenty of occasions that he has made my hair standing up in the air with anger. Those are the moments that I try hard and sometimes I fail to remain calm and loving. I remind myself that I am an adult, with well-developed emotional intelligence. I accept also the fact that I am imperfect.